{"id":1405,"date":"2014-08-15T21:44:01","date_gmt":"2014-08-16T02:44:01","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.tonybeshara.com\/blog\/?p=1405"},"modified":"2014-08-19T09:23:31","modified_gmt":"2014-08-19T14:23:31","slug":"being-shy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.tonybeshara.com\/blog\/being-shy\/","title":{"rendered":"\u2026being shy"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I listened to a TED talk by a psychologist who claimed that more than 50% of the people in the United States consider themselves shy\u2026 A quick Google search seems to find that there are many articles that confirm this fact\u2026 So if you put 50% of the people in the United States who consider themselves shy in an emotionally stressful situation\u2026 like looking for a job\u2026 It&#8217;s no wonder that people have such a difficult time finding a job\u2026<\/p>\n<p>I have to admit that for the past few years, after writing four books on how to find a job as well as an online program that is almost foolproof at helping somebody find a job, I&#8217;ve been wondering why so many people still have a difficulty in finding one\u2026why so many people are out of work for so long and, after a year, almost become unemployable. It just didn&#8217;t make sense, or at least I wasn&#8217;t smart enough to figure it out. Being an extrovert and being surrounded by extroverts who are in some cases downright aggressive, I just simply didn&#8217;t think about it. What&#8217;s worse \u00a0is that even after more than 40 years of dealing with people, I should have known that many people, lots of people\u2026shy people&#8230; \u00a0have a real hard time getting interviews and selling themselves hard enough to easily get a job.<\/p>\n<p>It isn&#8217;t so much that it&#8217;s insensitivity\u2026although it is\u2026as it is just not paying attention\u2026 After all these years and having interviewed more than 26,000 candidates face-to-face, I should know that some people are so shy their shyness overwhelms their ability to sell themselves and get a job\u2026 And, like most people, the longer they go without a job, the harder it is..<\/p>\n<p>So here is what shy people have to do\u2026they simply have to push themselves to get interviews, by cold calling and running the risk of being rejected\u2026they then have to practice, practice, practice, practice, practice, practice and practice interviewing and asking for a job so that when they get into an interview and they are phenomenally, terribly nervous, they do what they need to do. Keep in mind they don&#8217;t have to give a stellar performance of A+ interviewing. All they have to do is be able to sell themselves well enough to get a job. I know I sound like a broken record when I talk about the practice it takes, but it does.<\/p>\n<p>If you are shy, you have to practice to the point where interviewing well becomes what psychologists call &#8220;unconscious competency.&#8221; (\u2026 Look it up) it is practicing so well that no matter how nervous or even distracted a person is, they interview well. I realize that this is not easy\u2026 but it is necessary\u2026<\/p>\n<p>And, think about it, 50% of the people that you&#8217;re interviewing with are also shy and they will have a tremendous amount of empathy for you&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I listened to a TED talk by a psychologist who [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[12],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v21.2 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>\u2026being shy - Tony Beshara Blog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.tonybeshara.com\/blog\/being-shy\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"\u2026being shy - Tony Beshara Blog\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I listened to a TED talk by a psychologist who [&hellip;]\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.tonybeshara.com\/blog\/being-shy\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Tony Beshara Blog\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2014-08-16T02:44:01+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2014-08-19T14:23:31+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Tony Beshara\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Tony Beshara\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"2 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.tonybeshara.com\/blog\/being-shy\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.tonybeshara.com\/blog\/being-shy\/\",\"name\":\"\u2026being shy - Tony Beshara Blog\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.tonybeshara.com\/blog\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2014-08-16T02:44:01+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2014-08-19T14:23:31+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.tonybeshara.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/813ec2a09af1cf80ff4eb6d4386ac9b1\"},\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.tonybeshara.com\/blog\/being-shy\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.tonybeshara.com\/blog\/being-shy\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.tonybeshara.com\/blog\/being-shy\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/www.tonybeshara.com\/blog\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"\u2026being shy\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.tonybeshara.com\/blog\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.tonybeshara.com\/blog\/\",\"name\":\"Tony Beshara Blog\",\"description\":\"Job Search Solutions\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/www.tonybeshara.com\/blog\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.tonybeshara.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/813ec2a09af1cf80ff4eb6d4386ac9b1\",\"name\":\"Tony Beshara\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.tonybeshara.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/2997977d9f4c9419ddf13ee381c8bb2c?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/2997977d9f4c9419ddf13ee381c8bb2c?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"Tony Beshara\"},\"description\":\"Tony Beshara is the owner and president of Babich &amp; Associates, established in 1952, and the oldest placement and recruitment service in Texas. 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